Heavy ♥ {ed}

That's how I am feeling lately. Heavy ♥ {ed}. It's not a fun place to be, but it's needed sometimes. If certain things did not make me feel like that I would wonder about myself and my cold, calloused heart, ya know?

So, I've decided {apart from the fact that I use the word {so} entirely too much} that it really stinks being a grown up at times. When you are a young un' life is so simple and innocent. You are blissfully oblivious to the struggles, cares, and heartaches of this sin-filled world. You can enjoy life's daily pleasures without the weight of responsibility or troubles causing you to hunch down under their heavy load. You can run and jump and play with reckless abandon. Because you truly "haven't a care in the world". There's "those big people" to take care of everything for ya.

Well, now I am one of "those big people". And sometimes, I just don't want to be. Have you ever been there?

Why am I feeling heavy ♥ {ed}, you may ask? Well...in no particular order:

1. Because of sin and its destructive power--not only on the lives of the sinners, but also on their families, friends, acquaintances, and me, some 5,000 miles away.


2. Because of seeing so many of my "friends" fall by the wayside, sometimes with marriages that have fallen to pieces and that are far from the path of the Lord.


3. Because of "little sins" in my own life and how difficult it is to overcome them.


4. Because of heartache, grief, and pain that I watch loved ones go through and that I bear with them.


5. Because of the state of our country (actually both of my countries) and government.


6. Because of the lack of respect for and protection of Israel.


7. Because of the politics in our churches.


8. Because instead of helping a brother up and dusting him off, we are far to quick to kick him when he is down and bleeding.


9. Because Satan is alive and well and way too good at his job.

Depressing, huh?! Hence, I won't go on...especially as I am NOT depressed nor discouraged. I have decided not to allow these things to steal my joy.

Abraham Lincoln is quoted as saying:

"People are only as happy as they make up their minds to be." 

and 

"Let no feeling of discouragement prey upon you; and in the end you are sure to succeed." 

So, you see, I have a choice. And I choose not to dwell on these things, but to allow Christ to sustain me and move on. I think that's the key--I am not doing it on my own, but with Christ at my side, carrying me through the hard things, that in and of myself, I cannot handle.

Also, I am by no means saying that my life is not full of many, many blessings for which I am most thankful. Just this week the Lord has given me so much--healthy kids, extra family time, protection for loved ones both near and far away, etc., etc.

I have seen the miracle of new life (My friend, Flavia had her baby!! Such a tiny, perfect little bundle! :) and I have seen life through the eyes of my children (Always a precious sight!)

When I get my eyes off myself, my petty problems, and the situation, be it mine or that of my dear ones, and get them back clearly in focus on my Saviour, I realize it's not so bad after all!

"For the LORD God is a sun and shield: 

the LORD will give grace and glory: 

no good thing will he withhold 

from them that walk uprightly." 

Psalm 84:11